The Parable of the Lost Son AKA The Story of the Prodigal Son

The Parable of the Lost Son

Luke 15:11-32New International Version (NIV)

11 Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them. 13 “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. 14 After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. 15 So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything. 17 “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18 I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ 20 So he got up and went to his father. “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. 21 “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ 22 “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. 24 For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate. 25 “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 27 ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’ 28 “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29 But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends.30 But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’ 31 “‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”

Some things to remember about this parable:


Prodigal - 1. Characterized by profuse or wasteful expenditure 2. Recklessly spendthrift


The prodigal child lived the way he wanted for a period of time, but he came back to his father.  The opportunity for healing didn't occur until the prodigal child realized he wanted a relationship with his father.  A prodigal child will not return without a change of heart and it must be the prodigal child's choice to return.  I fear that if the father had actively sought out the prodigal child and tried to make the prodigal child see reason that it would have prolonged the prodigal child's absence.


You don't need to earn a parent's love.  You can count on a parent's love; it will always be there. The father had no choice but to continue tending his flocks and fields while the prodigal child was gone.  Other were depending on him.  He must have been hurt deeply but in his wisdom he knew that God was in control and that all things work together for the glory of God.


Every time I hear this parable I get something else out of it.  there's a good book called The Prodigal God by Timothy Keller that talks about the older son in this parable.  he talks about why the older son was made; because he followed all the rules and did everything he was supposed to and the younger son did not.  It's a very interesting read, especially to an oldest child.

Winter Storm

Sunrise this morning. It was 4* at 7am with a few snowflakes in the air. It was 3* at 7:30am and the clouds covered the sun and there was more snow. At 3pm today it is 30*, blue skies not a cloud in sight and no snow falling.
Apparently, the horses thought it was feeding time.
Isn't this the epitome of New Mexico weather? I could have moved the camera slightly to the left and gotten a picture of blue skies and slightly tot he right and severe dark clouds. LOL

A wise ruling

"16 Now two prostitutes came to the king and stood before him. 17 One of them said, “Pardon me, my lord. This woman and I live in the same house, and I had a baby while she was there with me. 18 The third day after my child was born, this woman also had a baby. We were alone; there was no one in the house but the two of us.
19 “During the night this woman’s son died because she lay on him. 20 So she got up in the middle of the night and took my son from my side while I your servant was asleep. She put him by her breast and put her dead son by my breast. 21 The next morning, I got up to nurse my son—and he was dead! But when I looked at him closely in the morning light, I saw that it wasn’t the son I had borne.”

22 The other woman said, “No! The living one is my son; the dead one is yours.”

But the first one insisted, “No! The dead one is yours; the living one is mine.” And so they argued before the king.

23 The king said, “This one says, ‘My son is alive and your son is dead,’ while that one says, ‘No! Your son is dead and mine is alive.’”

24 Then the king said, “Bring me a sword.” So they brought a sword for the king. 25 He then gave an order: “Cut the living child in two and give half to one and half to the other.”

26 The woman whose son was alive was deeply moved out of love for her son and said to the king, “Please, my lord, give her the living baby! Don’t kill him!”

But the other said, “Neither I nor you shall have him. Cut him in two!”

27 Then the king gave his ruling: “Give the living baby to the first woman. Do not kill him; she is his mother.”

28 When all Israel heard the verdict the king had given, they held the king in awe, because they saw that he had wisdom from God to administer justice." 1 Kings 3:16-28 NIV

For the longest time I felt guilty about us not forcing ourselves into Jeremy and Amber's lives. This story explains it. It caused the kids so much heartache and pain to be involved with Bo and I (and Benjaman) because their mother didn't want that. So she made it very hard on the kids. I sat next to both kids, lending comfort, while they were on the phone with their mom explaining that they just wanted to spend some time with their dad. They were saying things like: "Yes, Mom, I still love you" and "Mom, nothing's wrong, he didn't promise me anything. I just want to get to know my dad". Of course, these conversations happened when they were teenagers; they are burned into my brain along with every single mistake Bo and I made that alienated them further. Bo opted to just accept the minimum involvement their mother would allow when they were younger. Now I understand. I held it against him for a long time. I even felt guilty about it for a long time; I thought it had something to do with me or the kids not wanting to be around me. Now, I realize that they were made to pay for all contact with their dad, but especially me. It especially hurts now because we really thought we would have their adult lives to form relationships. Now Jeremy is gone and so is that opportunity. I am so glad that the year before he died he decided to spend time with us anyway. We at least have a few memories to cherish. I still feel cheated though. I know I'll see him in Glory and I know I should be satisfied with that. I know he lives on in my heart. Sometimes that isn't comfort enough. I won't know what kind of husband he would be; what kind of parent he would be, what kind of grand-parent he would be. I regret every bad moment between us; it is lost and I can't make it right. I also know that these thoughts are selfish and serve no purpose other than to harm me.

A plea to all who share custody of their kids:

PLEASE PUT THE KIDS FEELINGS AND NEEDS BEFORE YOUR OWN! There are long-lasting effects. Just because the child turns 18 doesn't mean the games stop. It doesn't mean that you are free of other parent. It also doesn't mean that you will be able to forge that relationship with the child. It is heartbreaking.

For all my loving family and friends: Please don't worry, I am okay. I'm just working through things. Apparently, taking anti-depressants for 2 years after Jeremy's death did not allow me to pass through grief. So, while it may seem belated to some, I am grieving as I should have done almost 3 years ago. There are no shortcuts in life. I hope someone can learn from my experiences.

WHY?

WHY?! Why did you give us a bath?! We worked very hard to get that smelly and dirty!

BJJ

Here's Ben after his stripe promotion with Professor Raphael. Ben is now Orange belt 3rd yellow stripe. Ben trains at Gracie Barra in Albuquerque.

Southwest Grapplefest V, Rio Rancho, NM
Benjaman is in the blue Gi in both fights.

From Bo:
Fight #1 The first match was against a girl who was ranked green belt (1 belt above Benjaman). He finished her with an arm bar technique.

Fight #2 The second match was against another green belt. Benjaman finished him with a choke while defending against an arm bar.

Don't worry if you don't know what "arm bar" means, Benjaman will be happy to answer any questions you may have!

Both matches were against very strong opponents and we are very proud of him.

Champ!

Sabbatical project

What's better to do on sabbatical than major household renovation?!

We (Bo) are (is) replacing the flooring in the house, removing the wood stove and (finally) finishing that corner, painting the bathroom and various other areas.

More cool floor for the dogs to lay on!

The laundry room. We are thinking about this color for the guest bath and the kitchen. We know it's dark and it might make the rooms seem smaller but it's so rich. It's really beautiful. If whoever buys our place doesn't like it then they can replace it!

Pictures

Here are the pictures from this summer so far...
My petunias, thought I killed them, but they came back!

HEY! Who did that?!
Ben and Grandpa Leslie at the Space Museum in Alamogordo.
Benjaman and Grandma Leslie at the Space Museum in Alamogordo.
Benjaman at the Space Museum in Alamogordo.
Kissy face Bo! lol
Ben feeding the bunnies at the Leslie farm.
Ben milking the goat at Leslie farm.
Red sun, the first day of the Las Conchas fire. This picture really doesn't do it justice. The sun looked like Mars.
Isotopes baseball game. No, I was not irritating that poor child! lol And he loved it!
Ben...pensive....
Ben, working....building the new "spot" for the washing machine water so our septic system would quit over flowing and I could do more than 2 loads of laundry a day. Wait a minute...who wants to do more than 2 loads of laundry a day! Oh well, get it all done in one day in my motto. Good thing I'm not God! There would be NO Sabbath! lolMe, freezing my arse at the crest. It was 100 degrees at home!
My morning glory vines. Hopefully they'll start blooming soon.
My spinach, I think. Is it? Is it ready to pick? Did I let it go too long? Why didn't I research this first?
Kawliga's wooden indian maid, from Denver's Museum of Natural History.
My hollyhocks finally hocked!

What sign? No beer? Well, we're outside the fence so it doesn't count.
My hollyhocks.

This is to remind you that it will cool off eventually and we'll be complaining then too!

Perspective

I can be depressed or

I can be thankful for...the roof over my head, electricity that almost never goes out, air conditioning, heating, pantry & freezers full of food, good friends, loving family, a good, loving, kind husband and a moral, upright, teenage boy (and that's the biggest miracle because it's a thing of the distant past)...I could go on, but these are the most important.

I hate....

I hate that Jeremy died. I hate depression. I hate alienation. I hate what my life has become. I hate the pain of those around me. I don't want to see how God will use for good. I just want to go back.

Flowers

This is a flowering bush we found along the road going up to Sandia crest last weekend.
My hollyhocks are finally blooming! They were getting wind whipped when Bo took the pictures though. lol
My poker plants are done blooming, but my free irises are still blooming.
One of my hollyhocks up close.

My wonky dream...

6/22/11

I had a dream…

I looked out the window in the bathroom and noticed a big sink hole in the back yard. It had jagged edges, was very deep and the ground looked moist deeper down. I could see what looked like tunnel with jagged edges going off in different directions. Bo had just left for work then he was in the house telling me to get ready because the city inspectors would be here in a minute.

When I came out of the bedroom my house was filled with people I didn’t know rushing here there and everywhere and the sliding glass door was open. I saw an opening to underground. “Wow, I didn’t realize it came this far over” I said. Then I saw steps going down into the hole. “Did you make these” I asked? “nope” said an unidentifiable worker. Parts of each step were missing, but every step was there so you could descend to the bottom. The steps were made of mosaic tile. The wall in the bottom was mosaic tile with gold. It was beautiful! There were people coming and going from the tunnels and up and down the stairs.

Peggy and the kids came over to see it all. There were a ton of people by this time just visiting to see it all. There were tables for people to sit and rest or eat a packed lunch.

It’s night time and Ben is home so we grab flashlights to show him. The place is deserted, it’s just us 3. I call the dogs and they come from the direction of the opening, then I see other eyes approaching in the dark. It’s 2 black cats, they are friendly. Then there are 2 more. I notice more animals around, but don’t know what they all are. I’m not afraid of the animals though I do remember that ancient Egyptians considered cats to be protectors from the un-dead. We go down the stairs and into the hole. There seems to be light coming from a room and I look in through a French door and see a man lying on his side with his arm stretched out in between stair railings. Apparently I’m looking in at the upstairs. I call the guys back, “Hey, here’s a body.” About the time they get to me the guy sits up on his knees and looks at us. Bo is in front, Ben and I behind. All of a sudden Bo says, “Run!” So we turn tail and run back to the entrance. Bo stops, vomits, tells me and Ben to get the truck. I say, “the 4runner?”. “No the blue truck” he says. Then he disappears back into the hole. Ben and I shoot up the steps and start the diesel. I am absolutely terrified. Bo, my 6’1” 250# husband who doesn’t back down from anything just vomited in fear…something…anyway, if it freaks him and sends him into immediate action you can be sure it’s absolutely terrifying! Ben starts to drive, he goes out on the road and circles back again into the other part of the circle drive. There is traffic now, people are starting to show up for the day. We made it back to the entrance just as Bo comes out and he gets in and drives us away…

Back story…a sinkhole opened up at the end of our house in Jan. 2007. Insurance paid to move the house and then cancelled the “earth cessation” part of our policy. It is now 2011 and we planted grass in the front yard and flower beds along the front of the house. The front porch is moving away from the house, the dirt up against the house in the flower beds is moving away from the house. In the road just outside our front lawn and going the entire length of the lawn the ground is split. It looks like maybe our front yard right up to the house is a small sink hole. It cost $18000 to move the house 4 years ago, the insurance won’t do it again and we can’t afford to do it. If something like the sinkhole happens again we are screwed. The property won’t be worth what we owe on it. There will be no place safe to put another house, we picked the flattest, most stable part of the property when we moved the house 4 years ago. We’ll have a mortgage on a piece of land that won’t hold a house. Good luck selling that! Oh, and I’m reading Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card. The Stand by Stephen King also comes to mind as I’m re-telling this dream.

Flowers

Bo expanded my flower garden this year. Last year it was just from the driveway to the front steps. This year we added from the other side of the front steps to the end of the house. That's a BIG flower garden! So I decided to plant my herbs, spinach and onions in the front as well. Any green is good and flowers are a bonus! LOL My hollyhocks are coming back from last year and there is something else trying to come back, but the rabbits are eating it so I don't know what it is! Stupid rabbits! I planted some petunias, marigolds (yellow and orange), asiatic lillies, foxglove, daisies, lavender, asylum and a wildflower mix. About half of the free irises I got are coming and one even has a bud! Of course, I planted morning glories by the fence outside my bedroom window. I just love morning glories! Bo planted a honeysuckle in the corner of the yard by the driveway. We also got a peach tree this year; it's in the front yard. Jeremy had a bleeding heart that he always wanted to plant so I planted it. I hope it wasn't too old to come up! Most of the grass came back, except for one patch that is grass-resistant! Bo bought seed that's supposed to grow anywhere, but it's not growing there! LOL Oh well. I spread the bark over the flower bed this afternoon, but 5 bags just wasn't enough. It's spread pretty thin; I think I need about 3 more. It looks like it's going to rain. YAY! My new transplants and seeds need some moisture from Heaven! I'll post pictures when I get a camera, hopefully soon! Happy Spring!

Long time...Update

Wow! It's been a long time since I posted! Our camera quit working so I quit posting. The pictures I took gave me ideas about what to post. Bo told me, "silly wife, you can post without pictures!" So, here you go honey, a post!

Here's the news since I posted last:

Both cats died. Nikki had to be euthanized because her body was just shutting down. Precious just couldn't handle life without Nikki. I'd had those cats for 19 years! They had been a part of my entire adult life! I miss their companionship terribly, but I sure don't miss all the hair and the litter box. They are both buried on top of Dee. They were her cats. Anytime either one cried, but especially Precious, Dee came running to defend.

The Lincoln County rescued puppies are doing well and finally settling down! I brought 3 back from Lincoln County because those dummies were going to euthanize them! The "authorities" found a nursing mother dog and decided to round them all up to euthanize them! Luckily, my mom went and rescued the whole litter, but she couldn't get her hands on the mama. The mama is still running around Lincoln County.

• One of Bo's friends from work took 1 of the puppies, a speckled cow dog looking female called Lena. Lena's a weirdo; she licks their house! She's calmed down though and they are enjoying her.
• Our speckled cow dog looking female is Benjaman's dog and her name is Trouble. She's a weirdo too! She sucks on her blanket if she's out of sorts or you upset her. She's a good dog. She's very leary of strangers. She has calmed down though. She's really a sweet dog and Ben finally has one of his own that he picked out! Trouble has several nick-names: Boo, Boo-Bear, Loony-Lou, Lou-Bug, Bug. She answers to them all! LOL She is 50#.
• Our tri-color male is mine and his name is Rowdy. His weirdest trait is that he pees like a horse; he stretches out long to pee. For awhile he would lift his leg a little, but he's quit that. It's embarrassing to me that my boy dog doesn't lift his leg. Oh well. Rowdy is just dumb. He's a big dumb lug, but he's a sweet boy. He's never once growled or snapped at a person. And while he was a barker when he was a puppy; he doesn't bark much now, unless you are on our road or coming in our gate. He weighs 70#!

I had dreams of walking all 3 dogs every day, a la Ceasar Milan. Well, a 70# dog is hard to handle and even harder to handle with a 50# dog! Maybe I'll try again now that they have calmed down some.

Belle is doing good. She needs an Estradiol shot about once a year to keep her urinary tract working properly. We know she needs it because about every Feb. or March she starts waking up in puddles. Poor girl looks so confused when that happens! So we get her a hormone shot and she goes into heat for a little while (really weird for a fixed dog!). She's not as recovered as we would like from getting run over on the interstate in 2008. She still runs after the horses and chickens and she'll chase whatever you throw, but she gets real sore if you don't watch her close and make her stop. She can't get up from sitting or lying down quickly, actually, now that I think about it, she doesn't sit hardly at all. She had knee surgery and recovered well from that. The vet thinks she's as good as she can be given her injuries. She's starting to play with Rowdy and Trouble. That's good to see!

We still have all 3 horses. Sarah still isn't trained. I haven't even attempted it after my last failure with the saddle. Cinbar is doing well, keeping weight on. Dutchess is fine, but I think she gets restless this time of year. She wants to be out and about. Of course, the wild horses are down all the time. Last summer they got our horses really sick. They passed some kind of virus through the fence. It cost us about $250 in vet and medicine bills and countless hundreds more to put the weight back on them. They are all healthy now though.

The wild horse herd is growing and becoming domesticated. There is a woman who feeds them every day. She has names for them all. While it's a nice sentiment, the herd has become bigger than this area can support. It is neat that you can walk right up to them and pet them though. How many people have walked right up to a wild horse and pet it?

We finally lost our 2 oldest chickens; Brownie and Gimpy. Brownie got left out and the dogs chased her until she got caught in the fencing and died. Bo found Gimpy keeled over in the pen one day. They were 7 or 8 years old! Brownie only quit laying last year and Gimpy quit laying 3 years ago. Gimpy used to consistently lay double yolk eggs and sometimes double eggs (double yolk & double white!). We still have 10 laying hens but have been very disappointed all of them except the Rhode Island Reds. Only 3 Buff Orpingtons went broody 2 years ago; none since then. They quit laying sooner than the Reds and began laying later than the Reds. Maybe we will buy more Reds and then sell the others. We have a beautiful Cochin rooster who is not aggressive. That's good for him because it means that his head gets to stay attached to his neck! LOL

This school year has been good.

• Ben participated in Teen Pact in February. Teen Pact is a Christian organization that provides a mock legislature. It lasts 4 days in Santa Fe and they get to meet the governor and many legislators. The do a few prayer walks around the capitol building. This all takes place while our legislature is in session. Ben learned alot about the legislature, but he came home a very firm Christian. He finally got it about Christ's sacrifice for us and how to pray for guidance to live a Godly life! I'm so proud of him!
• Ben also competed in Speech and Debate as part of a Christian Homeschool league. He didn't really enjoy the actual competition, but he loved the fellowship at tournaments. Again, very Christian kids trying to live Godly lives.
• He decided he was going to Charter school next year and then the minute we said okay and enrolled him, he said nevermind. LOL I guess he just wanted to know if we'd let him. He said he appreciates the flexibility of homeschooling. YAY! Another accomplishment!
• Ben took a year off Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. He recently went back, but to another school, Gracie Barra. He loves it! Bo and I really like this school. The teachers really enjoy working with the kids. If we had made this switch years ago, he probably wouldn't have taken the year off. Oh well, live and learn.
• Ben started his first year of high school this year. This fall was a huge adjustment period. He's taking an Algebra class outside of the home. I also bought high school curriculum. There was a lot more expected of him this year and he really struggled this past fall. Around Christmas time though, he just changed. The concept of greater responsibility comes with greater expectations really hit home for him. He read the book Do Hard Things and he changed. Then he read Crazy Love by Frances Chan. He started working harder on his school work. He argued less. I'm so proud of how he has grown up over the last few months!

Bo has been working and trying not to get bogged down by everything that needs to be done around the property. His second sabbatical is coming up this summer. It is 2 months and he has more projects than sabbatical and definitely more projects than money! He also remembered that his family owns a homestead between Roswell and Tatum. Anyone that knows Bo knows that it's been his lifelong dream to live out in the boonies, off-grid. So, back to Roswell we go. There's work that needs to be done first so it will be a little while yet.

In my attempt to avoid depression I decided to take on volunteer duties at church and to begin working part time. So I'm church treasurer and the Christian Education director. Our church is very small so they aren't big jobs. But then, I work preparing taxes part time, with a few full time weeks in February. Then, Ben has outside classes and activities on top of his regular school work. Long story short, I severely over-committed myself. I ended up in bed sick for 2 weeks and another 2 weeks of going slow to recover. Now I have to make some choices for next spring.

The good news is that I think I've got my depression under control. I think I'm starting to come out of the grief of losing Jeremy. That doesn't mean I've forgotten him or gotten over his death. It just means that I'm starting to see the sun again. I'm coming out of that dark tunnel. I feel like it's spring time for my soul as well as for the Earth. As I look around, I can't believe the state of affairs of my home and my family. I have neglected both. We now live in a house instead of a home. So I'm working to make it a home again.

I think that's the most comprehensive update I can come up with right now. Maybe we'll get a camera soon and I can start chronicling our lives again with pictures. It’s so much nicer to have pictures with the words!